50 Shades Of Grey By E.L. James – Haters Gonna Hate

50 shades of grey review by Nicci Harris

Let me start by saying there is a special place in my heart for 50 shades of f%#ked up.
This novel has been scrutinised by academics and avid readers alike. I have seen some really offensive reviews that left me dumbfounded as to how anyone can criticise another person’s work in such a fashion. ESPECIALLY when it has out sold most novels released the same year and . . . every year after.

Let’s give credit where credit is due please, people. This novel has managed to dominate (pun intended) other rivals of a similar nature, including my personal favourite the Crossfire Series.
Academics & ‘some’ readers get too hung up on correctness. 

Let’s not forget the original single scroll of On The Road by Jack Kerouac . . . 

-grammar and formatting is not everything!

Writing is an art, but it is also subjective, and should be treated as such. 

Forget the prose, forget the traditions, 50 shades the grammatical errors (yes I just made 50 shades a verb), and forget the copy-and-paste cringe worthy segments. At what point did we all forget that we read for fun?

“Sometimes I wonder if there’s something wrong with me. Perhaps I’ve spent too long in the company of my literary romantic heroes, and consequently my ideals and expectations are far too high.” Ana Steel, 50 Shades of Grey…

50 shades of Grey entertains the masses and has a lot of solid dialogue.

I give it 3.5 / 5 low-riding jeans.

So we start with Ana or Anastasia or Miss Steel, who is basically Bella from Twilight, meek, clumsy, brunette, white and lacking.
Lacking what?
I do not know. Do you?
Let me know? But lacking something everyone else has. She is wanted, popular in a sense, intelligent, and even confident in way, but still. . . lacking.

Ana’s best friend and roommate, Kate, has asked her to interview a famous businessman in her stead as she happens to be sick. Ana finds herself face-to-face with the infamous gorgeous billionaire Christian Grey who sees her as nothing more than an inconvenience. To start with.

Now one thing that is great about 50, is that it doesn’t Instalove all over your face. It does Instalust all over your face but that’s okay, because who hasn’t been there right?
Am I right ladies?
A hot, billionaire with a thing for lip biting and rosy cheeks will demand a certain level of Instalust.

Then we have Christian Grey who is basically a human version of Edward Cullen.
Deep, brooding, protective, a bit A-holey, and misunderstood.
Now Christian’s taste in women ‘is singular,’ and when Ana falls, trips, collapses, damsel-in-distresses all over his face. . .
-well the tainted knight in him erects his joist. So he is hard-core after her, wanting to. . . not make her a notch on his bedpost, but rather chain her to a notch on his bedpost. Of course, he doesn’t know why he is ‘incapable of staying away from her’ and she despises him and his sexual preferences for the most part.

It is a strange-not-strange, and yet obvious and confusing oxymoron kind of attraction for them both. . .
-or perhaps just the moron part, of oxymoron.

The emails are my favourite part of this book. The subject lines had me in fits of laughter as did the word play. Her emails are sassy, witty and challenging, she tops-from-the-bottom and he hates to love it. I just loved it. Ana seems to really express herself in her emails and has a wicked little bite.

This is what sets the Ana Steel character apart from the Belle Swann character. . . she is funny. She is really funny. On occasions I wanted to strangely her but for the most part she displays this weird and wonderful energy that I irrevocably like in a female protagonist.

The characters have layers, they are both funny when warranted, agitating, passionate and aggressive. Christian has a backstory, that this is really the basis for the entire plot line. 

Unfortunately as far as I can tell, Ana doesn’t. 

Personally I’d like to know why Ana is the way she is; why is she drawn to a man like Christian and why is she so sexually inexperienced.

The chemistry between Grey and Ana is well established straight away and only intensifies. E.L James does this well. They are involved in a tango of sorts throughout the entire book. The traditional YA and NA tango.

I judged this book by what it was. It was meant to entertain. . . and 50 delivers. Don’t over analyse and stop hating, cause ‘haters gonna hate.’

What I disliked. . .

Sigh. A lot. . .
But I’m trying to be nice.

The main issue I had was with the repetitive descriptions. . .
His pants hang around his hips. Yes we know. . . fuck, do we know! Ana we know! He has a nice torso. His jeans hang low around his hips. We get it. Please don’t say it again!

My final thoughts: Read it and relax, because it won’t challenge you but it will entertain you. Have a fucking cosmopolitan and don’t be a hater. . . it is what it is.

Get it here: https://amzn.to/2NEWcnU (paid link)

 

 

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